Because eventually, one day (optimistically), I’m going to have to deal with the Change of Status Situation. And I can already guess what an enjoyable conversation THAT’S going to entail:
"So… should I be changing my status?"
"My status. On Myspace**. Should I, you know… change it?"
"To?" (Because hey, men can be pretty freaking clueless)
"Um. ‘In a Relationship’?"
"Oh." [insert awkward silence]
Yeah, I’m *really* looking forward to that day.
I’ve mentioned before that I’ve never really gotten the hang of identifiying this transition, the point at which someone goes from "that guy/girl I’m seeing" to "my boyfriend/girlfriend." There was that one time in college when I found out sort of by accident that we had progressed into the significant-other phase, but for the most part, it hasn’t been until that revolutionary introduction ("X, I’d like you to meet my girlfriend, Lora") that I’ve ever known. Because I don’t ask. Because it really does seem to me that, if I have to ask– well, basically, I shouldn’t have to ask because I should already know. If I have to ask, if I don’t already know, then I’m probably not and we probably aren’t.
But the thing is, then, my not-knowing could be kept a secret; it wasn’t *obvious* that I didn’t know, or if I thought I knew (but was actually jumping the gun), so long as I only referred to him as "my boyfriend" to people with whom he never came into contact, I was in the clear.
Now, with Myspace, everyone and their dog’s mother’s bag of Doritos can see whether I list myself as "Single" or otherwise. If I’m dating someone and *he* thinks we’ve hit that stage and he still sees "Single" on my profile, is he going to get pissed? Or suspicious? Or worried? I don’t want that. Similarly, if I change it while he thinks we’re still in casual-dating mode, is he going to get weirded out? I don’t want that, either. GOD, MYSPACE, COULD YOU MAKE MY SOCIAL LIFE ANY MORE COMPLICATED? GOD.
But more than that, I *really* don’t want to have a stupid conversation like the one above.
*I’m on El Facelibro, but I sign in maybe once every two months.
**I know it’s spelled MySpace, with a capital "S," but I don’t like the way that looks. My lowercase "s" is deliberate. Leave me alone.