Wherein you wish I’d just settled with what I had for lunch

1. On the one hand, getting my period is great because it means I'm not pregnant. On the other hand, it ALSO means that I've just been getting fatter.

2. Though speaking of which: somehow, I spent the last four weeks doing nothing resembling significant physical activity– no running, no dancing (I KNOW I WAS IN NEW YORK, LET IT GO), no hiking, *nothing*– and instead simply eating everything in sight (except mushrooms; mushrooms and I are parting ways for an indefinite amount of time), and managed to *not* gain weight. I think. I don't own a scale. But I still fit in all my clothes! So that's pretty damn amazing.

3. Ever since we were in L.A. for the Playboy thing, I've been keeping my nails super short. Like, almost-down-to-the-quick short. And just as I was surprised to discover two years ago that I really like having my hair short, I'm now discovering that I rather like short nails. I'd always been averse to them because I think I have stubby fingers, and longer nails extended the line into something vaguely more attractive– like heels for stumpy legs (which is also why I wore exclusively heels for so much of my life). But I like them NOW, is my point, except for the added maintenance that comes with trying to stunt something that's perpetually growing. I'm thinking of taking up the violin, is what I'm really trying to say.

4. I finished watching "City of Ember" on the flight back from JFK (side note: flying standby can be such a bitch sometimes, but it's totally worth it for the zero-cost-difference seat in first-class), and aw man, is it cute. I hadn't read the book in over a year, so I was almost able to watch it without getting all nitpicky about the details (I *did* do a quick re-read of the book after I got home, and I *do* like the book better and it really is best that I didn't read it before watching the movie, but all in all, the movie's cute). And you know what? Saiorse Ronan is just so fucking adorable. I saw her for the first time when the trailer for "The Lovely Bones" was released and liked her instantly; now, after watching her in "City of Ember", my hope is further reinforced that "The Lovely Bones" movie might *actually* do the book justice.

5. And then I watched "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" today. Surprisingly cute! Or maybe I was just in a good mood. Things just feel right these days… not perfect, and not everything, but enough things and enough right that I'm holding up pretty damned well.

6. Honestly? I'd rather Odwalla had left their bars the way they were and raised the price instead.

7. Sometimes, that delicious-smelling colorful square wrapped in cellophane isn't candy. It's soap. DO NOT LICK.

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Sometimes four-and-a-half, if I have enough milk.

I just downloaded Google Maps 3.2.0 for Blackberry solely because it has the new Layers feature integrated and– actually, no. I downloaded it primarily because 3.2 isn't out for the iPhone yet so for the time being I can finally brag that my phone can do something that an iPhone can't, other than 1) make calls and 2) alert me of new messages and missed calls and low battery levels via a status LED; and secondly because the guy in the demo video had a cute voice. 

But anyway, I downloaded it and without really thinking about it, signed in to enable the Latitude layer, and then I started adding people, and *then* I remembered why I never use Latitude! For the same reason that I don't really like to use Foursquare! Because it's not that I'm averse to sharing with others what bar or restaurant or cafe or whatever I'm currently patronizing. I just really don't need to broadcast to anyone the fact that I am perfectly fine with shutting myself indoors and not leaving the house for three days straight.

Placeholder countdown, with (belated) greetings from New York

5 things are aren't slippery when wet:

  • Velcro
  • concrete
  • a cat's tongue
  • flour
  • a first-edition signed copy of Hemingway

4 reasons why I didn't answer your call 10 seconds after I sent you a text message:

  • had to pee
  • averse to mixed mediums for a single conversation
  • current location has poor/spotty reception and/or is too noisy for a conversation
  • I don't feel like talking, hence I sent you a text message in the first place

and 3 is the sum of 2 and 1.